THE
FOUR STAGES OF LIFE
JATINDRA MOHAN GANGULI
The
recommendation by the ancient sages of
The
first period extending to say the twenty-fifth year should be devoted to
learning and acquirement of knowledge for which diligence and concentration are
required. For the purpose of concentration some rules and disciplines are prescribed,
like living away from worldly attractions, aloofness from distracting
association and environment, food which is good for the intellect and for
mental concentration, celebacy, piety, regularity in
work and duties, etc. Surely observance of these rules is helpful to
acquirement of knowledgement.
After
Brahmacharya begins Grihastha
Ashrama or family life, in the course of which
experience of the world and of human relationships is gained and natural urges,
feelings and emotions are satisfied. But desires more and more come and
attachments to possessions grow more and more. These bring disappointments,
discontent, worries, anxieties, regrets, uneasiness and dissatisfaction and
make one look for a change which may dispel them and free him from friction, embroilments,
disagreements, unpleasantness, etc., which increasingly come in family
relations and in his field of worldly business and activity. But for fuller
experience and steadier desire for a change of life one should continue in Grihastha Ashrama for about
twenty-five to thirty years and thereafter take to Vanaprastha
Ashrama, when as a pilgrim he should move about from
place to place. As he moves about and sees the world more he understands the impermanence
of things which had attracted him and had raised hopes and desires which gave
no peace, no rest, no contentment. He sees through the illusion of their charms
and moves on reflecting and meditating on life, its purpose and significance.
His small little world wherein were confined his attachments and where his possessions
were stored melts away in the perspective of the wide world which he visualises as he moves through new places and meets new
persons and new circumstances. He sees and learns more and gains more knowledge
and wisdom. Unattached to things and persons he passes by life to him becomes
more stimulating, inspiring and enjoyable, than when his thoughts and
interests were confined within the walls of my own, the jurisdiction of my
rights and the limits of his mine. His fear,
anxiety, want, worry, drop off little by little and lighter his steps
become. His interests, love, feelings and sentiments as they open out and
spread beyond those limits bring satisfaction which they had not brought
before. With increasing knowledge and understanding of the causes of fear and
worry, discontent and dissatisfaction his old attachments weaken and he thinks
of more freedom and emancipation from the bonds of old and goes ahead beyond
this stage to the stage of steady Vairagya, the stage
of Sannyasa Ashrama. The
period of Vanaprastha must depend on the reactions of
the individual to the life he has lived and on his sensitivity and mental
development and aptitude analysing, discriminating
and judging the experiences he has come through.
In
the Sannyasa Ashrama he
frees himself steadily from desires and attachments and as he looks back on the
past indifferently and philosophically he finds more meaning, more purpose in
life than he had found before. Happiness and contentment which he had sought
through satisfaction of desires and impulses, he now understands, come
otherwise than from seeking them; they come themselves when they are not sought
and longed for. He now appreciates the true meaning of freedom which comes when
one obtains mastery over himself, over the excitements of his body and mind,
his feelings and emotions. Indeed, only such freedom, can
bring fearlessness and peace of mind, but such freedom comes stage by stage
with the gaining of wisdom and with the change of outlook on life caused by the
experiences which he comes through.
If
life is lived thus in four stages as recommended the experiences coming
through the years will not go waste but will be fruitful and will take him put
of the pains, sorrows, fear, and unhappiness which make life a trial in suffering,
regret and misery. But human folly, human weakness, human inability to pull out
of the physical and mental desires, cravings and attachments prevent most of the
men from coming out under the open sky of freedom where peace reigns. In spite
of growing friction and unpleasantness and crack of ties of love and attachment
they want to hold on to a niche in the family house where others have come and
established themselves and where he has become less desirable and acceptable
than before. Sticking on there is bound to interfere with the growing needs and
scope for development of the new-comers and to bring to the stickers-in
displeasure, disappointment and perception of being ignored and neglected. In
the days when they believed in the virtue of Vanaprastha
parents left the grown-ups to themselves and withdraw to live separately on
their own. Such withdrawal made the domestic ties loose to be gradually broken
by the wise parents in order to be emancipated from their sorrow-creating hold.
Indeed most of the troubles and woes are due to their not withdrawing but
sticking on and claiming regard and attention, service and care from relations
who are disinclined and disinterested to give them.
Outside
the family also, in their field of work and activity, those who cling to their
old posts, old work, old profession, old office chair, old ambitions, old
outlook, create friction, misunderstanding and unhappiness between themselves
and those who wait to take their places. Both sides are unhappy though they can
be happy if those who had their innings declare and leave the other side in
play.
If
people after about say twenty-five years of Grihastha
Ashrama adopt the third stage, the stage of Vanaprastha, they will find life fuller and more enjoyable
than they had imagined when they were confined within the walls of their family
and the boundary of the area of their business and profession. But Vanaprastha does not necessarily mean a ‘pilgrim’s wandering
life. It is rather a stage meant for loosening one’s attachments which can be
done by moving about and also by taking to hobbies other than of course the hobby of making
money, money which creates attachments, entanglements, meanness, selfishness
and many of the causes which bring unhappiness.
Those
who drag on their old activities, desires and attachments beyond the period of
closed Grihastha Ashrama
and keep their thoughts, interests and vision confined to them drag fear,
sorrow, disappointment, regret and bitterness on with them. And those who twist
their necks back to look for charms where there are no charms, and do not look
forward over the horizon for peace and tranquillity
miss the meaning of human life and the bliss and enlightenment_which
it can give.
It
is surprising that this simple truth does not strike people in spite of the
experiences of their life and that the easy way of escape from all that they
complain of in later life does not come in their view. And it is more
surprising that while they live differently and take different food, different
dress, etc., in different seasons they think not of changing their living,
occupation, thoughts and interests with the changing seasons and periods of
their life. When they make and have been making contacts with different men for
business and for expansion of business they think not of contacting others,
the, great thinkers and writers, who can give better business, the business of
living life happily, wisely and contentedly. If they devote themselves to the
study and acquirement of knowledge they will be happy themselves and with their
knowledge and wisdom and their disinterested good thoughts for others they will
become saints in the Sannyasa Ashrama
and will show the way to others to be happy. If there was need to think of
money once there is need also to think of money as means and not the end of
life. If there has been ambition
to gain power, position and leadership there should be ambition also to give up
the power, position, advantages and leadership which had been held for years to
others and to leave to them the
field of their own former activities.
Those
who hold on to their jobs, positions, professions or business till the end and
compete and fight and do all that they can to retain them cannot be fully
developed men. In developing fully a man develops more than one interest and
his vision spreads beyond a particular thing or spot, but the above veterans
who keep themselves fixed in their places and think of little else besides
money and position have not developed that way. Business and profession,
politics and some political isms hold their mind, attention, idea and imagination.
When they should come out of the old occupation in the freedom of Vanaprastha how they keep their body and mind; their vision
and thoughts, confined therein, how they toil and struggle to bitterest end to
stay in there is hard to appreciate and yet that is what most people do. When
the never-retiring politicians talk of their country’s freedom I wonder if they
who have, remained slaves to their one concern of being in political power know
what freedom is. And so also those who do not feel the urge to come out of the
hole, of the Grihastha life after having been there
for twenty-five years or more. The call of the outer world they have not heard;
the stimulating charm of the free air of Vanaprastha
they have not seen, the fearlessness and carefreeness
which come from the loosening of the ties and bonds of attachment in the Grihastha life they are unable to imagine. They read holy
books, perform religious ceremonies and worship deities, but they remain far
from comprehending the essence of religion and religious philosophy. They are
indeed not fully developed men. In giving their all, time, energy, thoughts,
perseverance to one concern, to one effort they neglect to develop their other
faculties, their responsiveness to fresh inspiration, their imagination, their
power of conception and the other perceptivities which make man a full man.
The
four stages of life if well lived help the fuller development of man and lead
him to the state where fear, pain, sorrow, grief, worry, nothing disturbs his
peace and blissful contentment. But the experiences which generate wisdom and
urge him to go ahead come stage by stage through the
four Ashramas and not by short cuts through them. Grihastha Ashrama is of
particular importance because it is through the satisfaction of the various natural
physical and mental urges and desires and through the attractions and
attachments formed during the period that one understands their nature and
understands also that they do not limit but extend the purpose of life and do
not close but open the way to life where joys and sorrows, hopes and
disappointments, griefs and miseries, regrets and
anxieties are not inevitable but are impossible. Even from a distance some
sages have visualised this state and have described
it as the state of Ananda, which does not mean just
joy which creates longing for more and more of it, but that sense which is full
in itself, which has nothing to seek, nothing to look for and desire for. It is
that sense which brings the sense of oneness with the All-Pervading One.
Those
who in impatience or in fear of the trial of life try to jump to the stage of Sannyasa hardly succeed, because they have to struggle with
the natural calls of life and to keep themselves ever on guard against their pulls,
charms and attractions. Charms pursue one who flees in fear; they should be
faced and broken through to be free from them. To break them the experiences of
coming during the years of the Grihastha life should
be gone through and the lessons of falls, failures, disappointments, sorrows, griefs and all the other experiences be learnt patiently
and steadily.
“I am endeavouring to
see God through service of humanity, for I know that God is neither in
heaven, nor down below but in every one.”
–Gandhi